Immediately, I felt the presence of Holy Spirit and this questioning of why was I there. I could feel sadness from Holy Spirit, not accusation. Why was I there? What about all of this stirred me? What did it feed in me? What good did it offer me?
A year-and-a-half ago I wrote a blog for Destiny In Bloom about "the little 'g' word" ... gossip. This blog came to mind and I opened it up to read through it again after all this time. I was appalled and now fully aware of how long gossip has been a struggle for my flesh. I know the Lord has gotten my attention when it comes to speaking to others about others. I definitely don't get it right 100% of the time, but compared to where I was years ago, conviction is right at my doorstep now instead of days or weeks later.
But what of this kind of gossip? The kind that allows me access to the private lives of people I don't know and will never meet. What is so tantalizing about the dirt of celebrity lives? Because let's be real ... most of what's printed is not to lift up or edify anyone - minus the occasional wedding or new baby cover story. It's salacious stories meant to tear down and defame, and report on the latest scandal or act.
I Googled scriptures on gossip and was immediately convicted by this scripture:
Romans 1:29 – “They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips.”
Reading through my blog, another scripture jumped off the pages:
Proverbs 15:9(a) – The way of the wicked is an abomination, extremely disgusting and shamefully vile to the Lord...
And what of the definition of a person who gossips?
Gossip - a person who habitually talks about other people, usually maliciously.
Wow! The weight of all of this is finally hitting my heart.
Proverbs 15:9(b) ...but He loves him who pursues righteousness (moral and spiritual rightness in EVERY area and relation).
And then I came to the ending of my DIB blog:
God is asking me if I am ready to move beyond revelation and into real change.I can see clearly now how boulomai plays out in one's life: desire without change (because I've done nothing to change my behavior). How could I have expected my desire to change if I'm still feeding the monster? Gossip is wicked. And getting off on someone else's tragedy is just as shamefully vile. I hear you, Lord!
Something I read a couple days ago really hit my heart and summed up my thoughts on receiving revelation versus the heart’s willingness to pursue real change.
“Matthew uses the Greek verb thelo. It’s translated “to will, to wish, to desire.” There’s another Greek verb that means almost the same thing. It is boulomai. But there is a difference. Thelo implies the action necessary to accomplish the desire. I don’t just want something. I go after it and get it. It is purposeful action toward a goal. Boulomai also means desire, but it does not imply I actually do something about it. There is no consequent action.
This small shift in meaning is the essential core of a lot of repetitive sinful behavior. Those of us who have been awakened to the realm of the Spirit know the difference between good and bad. We don’t usually sin in ignorance. We sin in defiance. We simply aren’t willing (thelo) to give it up. Yeshua has done all that needs to be done to rescue us from our tragic state of existence, but we aren’t buying. Why? Because we really aren’t willing to change. We want the benefits of grace without the pain and suffering of repentance. We want the Messiah without the blood. As Albert King used to say, “Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.” [skip moen]
So, here is my declaration:
I will not, from this point forward, engage in reading gossip magazines of any kind. No People.com or check out stand magazine racks. I will no longer feed my soul the trash of malicious writers. I will no longer perpetuate the rampant invasion of private lives by participating in online voyeurism. I am cutting that bondage out of my life and stepping forward into freedom. In Jesus' Name. Amen and So Be It!