Sunday, September 7, 2008

Expectations Unmet

Hope and hopelessness
I both watched it and lived it all in the same day
Some eyes radiated joy
Where others showed no signs of life
A room filled with current strangers
Offered the potential of future friends
My heart is saddened by the heaviness of heartache
While being uplifted by the freshness of new love
Though I'm not that far removed
From my new beginnings
Life has crept in like a thief in the night
And stolen precious jewels
Not the ones I wear around my neck
But the jewels I treasure in my heart

Love
Joy
Peace
Patience
Kindness
Goodness
Gentleness
Self-Control

Leaving in its wake a constant reminder
of Expectations Unmet
Words of affirmation can fill a heart in one moment
A love tank is full
And a smile is returned
The umbrella of Expectations Unmet safely tucked away for now
Hours pass as we walk in the borrowed happiness of
Two hearts' anticipation for their future
We've watched love grow from afar
And now we're in the midst of celebrating it
But even celebration can't completely cover
The dose of reality that is birthed
from Expectations Unmet
An afternoon of sunshine and smiles
Where revelations were shared and hearts revealed
Has turned into a nighttime of darkness
Where Pandora's Box of the Past
Has once again replaced

strain for Love
heaviness for Joy
chaos for Peace
quick fuses for Patience
harsh words for Kindness
judgment for Goodness
hard hearts for Gentleness
and damage for Self-control

How do I escape the baggage of my past
Of actions and reactions conditioned in me by life
Is it really as easy as climbing into the coffin of daily sacrifice
The one I drag behind me instead of crawling into
When will the line I walk
Of selfishness over selflessness
Cease to exist
My days dawn with the fresh breath of new life
Yet so often they end with the toxic fumes of my struggles

and Expectations Unmet

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